Adventure 6

Featured Image for The Gamer, Adventure 6 of the fiction blog Christy Palmer's Sexual Adventures

Poor dear! I’ve been rough on him. Not sweet and nice as I used to be and as I should have been. The worst thing is: he was really sweet and nice (although in his own particular way…). Anyway, don’t blame me! We can all agree that 100% of the blame goes to The Teacher! We ALL do. Let me explain…

Want to start from the beginning?

After everything that happened (or more, after everything that didn’t happen!) with The Teacher, I was going around as horny as a teenage boy. I’m not even kidding; I was real close to sexually assault every hot guy that was passing my way!

When I confess my raping urges to The Kind-of-Weird-Colleague while we were refacing the Travel Section, she first suggested I have sex with The Friend again:

“Isn’t it what he is for? Making you come when your hands won’t do the job?”

Oh my goodness, the things she’s way too comfortable saying right in front of clients! A little old lady who was checking up a Vatican City travel guide looked at us like we had excrement on our heads before she left the bookstore, murmuring something about how the youths had no manner these days.

Although, The Kind-Of-Weird-Colleague had a point there… But the thing is, I hadn’t seen The Friend in those circumstances since the night we did it for the first time.

I know we agreed we wouldn’t become a couple for all the reasons he clearly mentioned, but if I’m totally honest with you (which is the point of that blog after all!), I’ve been seeing him differently since it happened. I just CAN’T see him only as a friend anymore. It’s impossible.

And I know it’s ironic! I started those adventures to have fun while taking away the getting-attached-and-getting-hurt part of it and I know a fuck buddy just falls completely into that category of relationship, but…

But looks like my head didn’t get the memo!

When I am not being careful, I keep imagining what our life could be like and what a great father he could become. It is beyond annoying.

So yeah, having sex with him again? No way! Not until I’m able to put those thoughts far, far away from my conscience! (Though I can’t be held responsible for what happens in my subconsciousness and unconsciousness!)

“Then you have to grab yourself someone else soon,” concluded The Kind-Of-Weird-Colleague admiring our beautifully presented shelf.

“Wow, what a genius!” I thought, using up all my strength not to say it out loud.

Instead, I agreed with her but added that it was easier said than done.

“I’m going to [The Super-Geeky-Store] to play some board games tonight. Come along. If you don’t find yourself a guy there, you won’t ever have sex again.”

Thanks, my dearest colleague! Not putting any pressure…

But it was a good idea. Plus I love board games and I couldn’t play as often as I wanted to when I was a child because I have no brothers or sisters.

My first reaction getting into The Super-Geeky-Store was how cool it is! When I arrived, The Kind-Of-Weird-Colleague was already there with her friends. I was a little nervous about not knowing anyone but her (and I even don’t know her that much) but turns out they were really cool.

“I was keeping this chair just for you,” said The Gamer, a geeky-cute guy with the biggest smile on Earth. How so nice of him! I felt like nothing could bring him more happiness than having me sitting by his side.

Throughout the very fun evening (playing unknown board games ended up being so entertaining!), he explained me the rules of the games we played and kept on telling me what moves was best for me to play. The Gamer was so helpful! And he was also openly flirting.

I guess you figured out by now that I don’t mind being the one who is chasing—you know, girl power!—but it doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate having men work for me from time to time. Because, you know, free drinks and compliments never get old!

So watching him do all those attentions to me, I wasn’t worried at all about ending the night with him and finally releasing the excess of hormones The Teacher had left in my system.

And guess what: I was wrong!

Up to now, it had been pretty easy for me to find guys who just wanted a physical relationship and nothing more. Okay, it’s true they didn’t always had a satisfying outcome, but at least, we still had the same goal. Most of them were more than okay with getting naked the first night.

But not The Gamer, apparently.

When we got out of The Super-Geeky-Store, I walked him to his car.

“Do you want to come over to my place for some coffee?” I asked him with my cutest smile.

“Sorry. I’m working early in the morning, so I can’t… But I could take your number instead? If you want to see me again sometime.”

It wasn’t AT ALL what I wanted.

But as he had been really nice, so I just gave him my number and went back home feeling more disappointed and lonelier than ever.

The kind of loneliness who made me pass an hour lying on my back, looking at my conversation with The Friend on my cell phone, evaluating whether I should text him to come over or not.

To finally fall asleep and drop my cell right into my face which hurt bad and made me furious about life in general.

When I woke up more pleasantly the next morning, I had already received a text from The Gamer! Two thoughts then crossed my mind:

  1. Aw! How cute of him! He couldn’t wait any longer to tell me he had a great night and if we could see each other again soon!
  2. …Okay, isn’t that a little hasty? Maybe it would be better if I don’t go out with him again… He seems a little intense.

It was surely the side effects of the loneliness, but I stuck to impression #1 and texted him right away that I would really like to see him again.

And the second—I swear, the SECOND—the message was delivered, I received another text from him. The only explanation I see to this is that he had already written the text and he was just waiting for a response from me to press “send”. That is, well… a bit intense to my taste.

But what the message said however was totally intense:

I’m free tonight! Wanna watch a movie?

I texted back:

Sure! My place, 8pm

And send him my address.

Yes! I did!

Even though he was clearly too intense for me! But to my defence, I thought that maybe he had really been working early (which would completely explain the early texting) AND that maybe proposing a movie tonight was just his gentleman way of telling me he also just wanted sex with me so that we could both go back to our life as soon as possible.

I know I’m naive… I just can’t help it sometimes.

When he arrived with a superhero movie and a pack of obscure microbrewery beers, I felt beyond relieve. Like, “He brought alcohol! THANK YOU JESUS! He wants to get me slightly intoxicated to increase his chances of having sex with me!” (Oh! I know! I sound so desperate! It’s miserable…)

So halfway through the movie, I got real close to him and started kissing him on the neck and as he was really receptive, I turned his face to kiss him… He responded to the kiss, but only for about half a minute. Then, he backed away slowly. (Yes! Him too! I’m starting to worry that I may be a bad kisser… I definitely should google “How to be a good kisser” just to be sure!)

“I don’t want you to miss the film,” he said with a smile. “Plus this is my favorite part!”

I almost roared with exasperation. Come on! Like I cared about his superhero movie! (Normally I would, but not when I have other plans for the evening!)

At that point, I was starting to get less naive and I understood that maybe “alcohol” plus “date” doesn’t necessarily equals “sex”. What a revelation, I know! (I’m sorry, guys. I should have put a “Spoiler Alert” before that statement.)

Anyway, until the end of the movie, I tried to hijack his attention, with very little success, so I almost applauded when I saw the generic.

“How did you find it?” he asked me with sparkling eyes.

“Yeah, it was good!” I don’t know if it was a lie or not as I was too busy trying to get physical with him to acknowledge we were watching to a movie. “Do you want to… go to the bedroom?”

Okay, for my self-pride, I have to intervene here: I GET how desperate I sounded there, so no need to tell me! And if you don’t complete get how I could be that desperate, go read The Teacher again! I’m still having classes with him every week! Seriously, I’m sure they torture people with something similar in Guantanamo!

So, yeah! I was desperate enough to ask something like “Do you want to go to the bedroom?” to a guy who clearly doesn’t have that idea in mind!

“Why don’t we just stay here, finish our beers, and talk. I want to know you better,” he said, again, being too adorable.

How could I act like a player after this? Nice guys who just want to talk on the second “date” (if we can call that a date considering what I had in mind…) are an endangered species. I couldn’t try to change him!

So we talked and it was nice. We laughed a lot and at the end of the night we even had a really cute goodbye kiss in the hallway. That could have been a great night… If only I was in need of being in a relationship with someone other than The Ex!

So… I just couldn’t stand it any longer and I texted The Friend at the very second I closed the door behind The Gamer.

What are you doing?

And without waiting for an answer I also texted him:

Could you come over? I have a serious case of sex emergency.

I felt stupid right away when I realized I had really sent him that last text. But he responded me just fast enough so I didn’t completely panic.

It would have been an honor to solve this emergency for you, but I’m out of town for a couple of days

Family matters…

I’d make it up to you when I come back 😉

He is so cruel! Text-teasing me when I already have a sex craving crisis on my plate? That’s not nice of him at all… But instead of being mad, I asked him what was going on with his family and we texted for about an hour and a half. And considering what the matter is… Let’s say I’m not mad anymore. At all. Poor guy…

The next morning waking up, guess what? I had another text from The Gamer waiting for me! And yes, you guess it right, my dear readers: he wanted to see me again that very evening!

Right when I arrived in the dinner room at The Bookstore that morning, I told everything to The Kind-Of-Weird-Colleague.

“So you’re going to see him again tonight, right?” she asked not leaving her eyes from her manga comic.

“I have no idea… Maybe…”

“Just a head’s up if you do,” she said still reading her book, “he plans on proposing tonight.”

“PROPOSING?” As I’m writing this, I still can’t believe it. “What the hell is wrong with that guy?”

And yeah, this time, I really said that to her.

And her response was (prepare yourself mentally, this is something!): “Don’t know. He just said that you couldn’t possibly resist a medieval wedding.”

Yes… Couldn’t POSSIBLY resist a medieval WEDDING!

So, as any sane young woman would do in a situation like this one, I:

  • deleted him from my cell phone;
  • blocked him on every social media we were both on;
  • hid behind a pyramid of Psycho-pop books when he came to see me at The Bookstore;
  • and planned on never going to The Super-Geeky-Store ever again (just in case).

And that’s the end of the story!

In case you were wondering, The Kind-Of-Weird-Colleague was okay with me avoiding his friend both on and offline. In fact, she even said:

“Relax. I get it. I probably should have told you he was intense.”

How a good idea that would have been!

And I’m still having a serious case of sex emergency (thanks for asking!).

Want more? Keep reading! Adventure 7: The Tattooer

What did you think of Christy’s adventure this week?
Do you think she was too hard on The Gamer? Or do you think you would have reacted the same way?
Tell me in the comments!

Wanna know the truth about Christy's break up?
(Yeah... She lied about it...)

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  • Reply
    March 9, 2016 at 11:57 pm

    Speechless. I’m totally speechless. You know why.
    #killme #medievalwedding #mostembarrassingmomentofalifetime

    • Reply
      Leftie Aubé
      March 10, 2016 at 5:46 am

      I don’t know if it means you liked it, but I hope it does 😉
      Love you girl 🙂

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